Tanking Canucks Quiz!


In your mind, which of these actual quotes best describes the plight of the Vancouver Canucks?

1. “To tell you the truth, we got outplayed pretty badly. A lot of our players looked like they were skating in quicksand.”

2. “Hey, the Canucks only managed 15 shots on net in the whole frickin’ game, and now they’re bottom of the league in that category.”

3. “Our top guys have got to do more 5-on-5, There’s not much going on. Actually, there hasn’t been much going on for a while.”

4. “We’re getting solid goaltending, we’re just not generating enough offensively, that’s obvious.”

5. “Vancouver started the game like a dulled spreading knife and the Red Wings skated through them like they were butter.”

6. “The Canucks? They just suck, plain and simple.”


2 Responses

  1. What do you expect? Staking your team’s future on a set of inbred twins ain’t much of a strategy.

  2. I just got back from Sweden where rumour has it they aren’t actually twins; they’re actually clones that were part of a huge post-Viking national identity-crisis experiment. The whole fucking thing was funded by IKEA… which is why they’re only good for a couple years. Now it’s garage sale time.

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