Gretzky sells his ATV for Jesus

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Last Friday, The Great One sold a bunch of toys to raise money for a Christian school in California out the goodness of his heart. It was purely coincidence that it happened days before Gretzky will be all over the news… when his former assistant behind the Phoenix bench will face the NHL commish to find out whether he’s permitted to return to coaching after sodomizing the laws of America. Really, #99 felt compelled to unload his ATV for Jesus and it had nothing to do with anything else. He crossed his heart and threatened to stick needles in his eyes, so we have to believe him. Rules are rules.

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