Hockey Night In Who-Gives-A-Fuck

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Last night, Jersey hosted Tampa Bay and drew a pathetic 13,000 fans to the Prudential Center a new, state-of-the-art rink. (OMG!!! R. Kelly is playing there on November 22nd and we’re taking our BFFs!!!) It was 4,000 fewer fans than the crowd they drew five days ago. And further south, to where no hockey should ever be played for any reason other than by accident, the Florida Panthers hosted the ‘Canes. Attendance? Around 10,000. And America’s fourth-fattest city hosted the retardedly skilled rookies of Chicago and drew a paltry 14,000.

The average rink holds around 20,000 people. Calgary, Vancouver, and Toronto have consecutive sell-outs in triple digit numbers. Just sayin’.

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