Niedermayer’s First Game Back


We’ll get there, but let’s cut to the meat: The future of the Ducks does not hinge on short people. Short people like Andy McDonald. It doesn’t hinge on mini Mac because without Teemu Selanne to set up, McDonald has been no better than comme ci-comme ca at best. So Ducks GM Brian Burke dealt his $10 million salary away to the St. Louis Blues this week in order to re-sign Scott Niedermayer. The McDonald move also allowed Burke to save enough salary cap room for the impending financial ass pounding that will be the Corry Perry contract extension. In exchange for the temporarily struggling/perennially underrated McDonald, Burke received a temporarily struggling/somewhat underachieving Doug Weight, a young Czech forward, and a 7th rounder in the year 3018.

How would the moves shake out?

Well, McDonald got down to business during the first period, roofing one over Kiprusoff‘s left shoulder. It sounded like the guy working the masturbatory celebratory fog horn fell asleep on top of the ‘on’ switch. His editorializing didn’t matter none. Calgary’s first line (Iginla, Huselius, Langkow) crapped all over the Blues by combining for 12 points. After Calgary’s 5-3 win, Huselius has ten points in three games (!), Iginla has six goals in the last three, and the Flames have won five straight on the road–a feat they haven’t hit since 1988. Wait. Nevermind that horrible gagging sound. It’s just Calgary’s 15-inch wang in our mouth.

Meanwhile, Scott Niedermayer’s first game went well against the Sharks. He started slow, logging six minutes in the first period, but made some solid defensive moves and his usual QB passing moves, including a no-look, backhand pass to break free of some double coverage. He finished the game a +1 (not bad in a 2-1 SO win), with 8 shots on net, and 24 minutes of ice. This is the guy who hadn’t played in the bigs since June. What is he, hockey’s Drago? Also, Weight sent a message by setting up Anaheim’s only goal. Suddenly, the Ducks looked un-terrible and not completely doomed…if they can stay out of the penalty box.

Analysis? Like summer camp and retard school, everyone’s a winner! Hooray!


One Response

  1. ‘….Wait. Nevermind that horrible gagging sound. It’s just Calgary’s 15-inch wang in our mouth….”

    15 inch wang for everybody. mmmmmh.

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