Jesus, we need us some writers

Meanwhile, let’s talk about US for a minute. As in WayOffside. We need us some writers. Who’s in? Send us an e-mail with a blurb about hockey and if it’s good, you’re in. There’s room for two or three. Try us at wayoffside@gmail.com.

Meanwhile, let’s catch up: Sweden Detroit won the Cup. Fanfuckingtastic, and man, it was a shocker. As in, three in the front and one in the back. (Who wants to watch a foregone conclusion? Who wants to watch Europeans, who could give a shit about the most coveted trophy in sports, hoist the mug and parade about with awkward and/or fake excitement? Well, at least Dan Cleary got to parade about. That guy wanted it.)

Also, free agency is coming July 1. Tradesville and rumors flaring up all over the place. So far, the Preds decided Ellis was the future (he was) and Mason a sieve (he was), the Leafs traded for a tough guy who’s older than me, Sundin’s talking to Montreal, Sutter’s “pumped” about drafting 17th overall, Malkin’s reportedly talking to a Russian club for insane money, and Vancouver may or may not be shopping the Sedin sisters. Oh, and some black guy is running for president.

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Dallas: Once the Toast of Texas, Soon to be Texas Toast

Pittsburgh vs. Philadelphia. The Battle of Pennsylvania. Blue Collar Mining Town vs. Financial, Political and Intellectual Center. Two high-flying squads that hate each other’s guts for the shallowest of reasons. A classic match-up for a Stanley Cup semi-final. But the Dallas Stars vs. Detroit Red Wings? It’s almost sad. The Wings are dissecting the Stars with characteristic laissez faire. And Dallas? They’ve gone as soft as a post-coital weenie. Modano where are ye? They may win one at home. Maybe. But it won’t matter. Even Don Cherry has written them off. Like we said: toast.

Avery: Still Not Dead…but hurt

And by “spleen” do they mean “vagina?”


Video: Hitler reacts to the situation in Vancouver

One team. Two chins. No job.

Nonis was fired. And predictably, the Brian Burke rumors are flying. Not the ones about him and Todd Bertuzzi on a Sunday in May, top down on the LeBaron, KFC take-out bags balled up and discarded in the back seat and miles and miles of nothing but….togetherness. No. The other ones.

Quote of the year

Maybe. Just fucking maybe. It’s right up there with Belak’s “we’ve all been caught with our pants down.”

My Favourite Time of Year

IS THAT DANIEL ALFREDSSON IN THERE?